Shemirat HaLashon שמירת הלשון

More than this. If it happens that one's friend conducts himself with him improperly in something, in spite of this, he must take care not to avenge himself of him and to bear hatred against him. But he must wipe the thing from his heart and do good to him in all ways, as to all other Jews, as if there were no hatred between them, as it is written: "Do not take revenge and do not bear a grudge against the sons of your people, and you shall love your friend as yourself." Come and see, in the holy Zohar, Parshath Miketz, how great is the man who repays bad with good:

"Come and see [how] Joseph [conducted himself]. Not only did he not return evil to his brothers, but he accorded them good and truth, as is the way of tzaddikim always, wherefore the Holy One Blessed be He has compassion for them always, in this world and in the world to come."

And in order to set one's mind at rest in this, I have thought it fit to introduce an exalted thought here which is rooted in the Yerushalmi adduced by Semag, that if one were walking on the road and struck one of his feet with the other and, in doing so, fell to the ground and hurt his body, his face and also that foot — aside from the fact that it would never enter his mind to take revenge of that foot by [desisting] from healing it, he would also harbor no hatred whatsoever against it. For what is the foot and what are his body and his face — they all are one [body], but divided into organs. Rather, he would reason that his sins caused this. Here, too, if it happened that his friend did not benefit him with a certain good that he asked of him, or even if he grieved or insulted him in some way, he should not avenge himself and harbor hatred against him. For who is his friend and who is he? Both are from one root, as it is written (I Chronicles 17:21): "And who is like Your people, Israel, one nation in the land?" And it is written [Bereshith 46:27): "All of the soul of the house of Jacob that came etc." It is not written "souls," to teach us that all the souls of Israel above are reckoned as one soul. It is just that each one is an entity in itself. As with a man in his entirety — even though, as a whole, he is one man, still, he has organs which are "heads" to him, like the head and the heart; and there are those beneath these, like the hand and the foot. And it is also into one rest that all of Israel will gather in the end — under the Throne of Glory — as it is written (I Samuel 25:29): "And the soul of my lord will be bound in the bond of life with the L-rd your G-d, etc." It is just that because in this world, where everyone is clothed in his own matter by himself, and because each of his affairs and undertakings is an entity in itself that a man imagines himself to be a distinct person and not "one" with his fellow Jew at all — but this is not so.

And that is why we find many times in the words of Chazal that if one transgresses, G-d forbid, he thereby harms all of Israel, for they [he and all the rest] are like one body. And if one has a great pain in one organ, the other organs, too, even though their pain is not so great, still feel a "vibration" of that pain. As we find in Vayikra Rabbah 84: "(Jeremiah 50:17): 'A scattered lamb is Israel.' Israel is compared to a lamb. Just as a lamb, if it is hurt in one of its organs, all of them feel it, so Israel — one sins and all feel it. R. Shimon b. Yochai said: 'This may be compared to [an instance of] men sailing in a boat. One of them takes a drill and starts drilling under him. His friends say to him: "Why are you doing this?" He answers: "What business is it of yours? Am I not drilling under me?" And they say: "But you are flooding the boat on us!"'"

Therefore, my brother, take great care not to avenge yourself and not to bear a grudge against your brother. For it is yourself against whom you are taking revenge and bearing a grudge! Think only that Heaven is causing all this to happen to you, because of your sins. And what difference does it make whether this suffering comes upon you by the one or by the other? And if I accept all this upon me [resignedly] in truth, all of my sins will be pardoned thereby. As David said to Avishai ben Tzeruyah when he wanted to take revenge on his [David's] behalf, of Shim'i ben Gera, for having shamed and vilified David and cursed him with a dire curse — David did not allow him [Avishai] to do so, saying: "The L-rd told him to curse!" And Chazal have said that because of this the Heavenly tribunal designated David to be the fourth leg of the Divine Chariot, as we shall explain at length below, please G-d.

[To set one's mind at rest not (even) to think of taking revenge and bearing a grudge) I have adduced my interpretation of (Vayikra 19:18): "And you shall love your friend as yourself; I am the L-rd," viz.: How are we to understand the juxtaposition of "I am the L-rd" with the beginning of the verse? I have said that the intent of Scripture here is to elucidate the beginning of the verse: "You shall not take revenge and you shall not bear a grudge against the sons of your people." ("And you shall love, etc.") For, ostensibly, that is to be wondered at. If one is very pressed for time and he asks his friend to do him a favor, and the latter is in a position to grant the favor and refuses, especially if he grieves him in the process — how can he not take umbrage, and even love him as himself?

I have explained the verse by an apt analogy, viz.: Reuven hated Shimon and stirred up a quarrel with him. Afterwards, Yehudah came along, who was held by Shimon and by all men to be a man of truth and told Reuven: "Shimon, whom you hate, and who you told me is dishonest and despicable — I saw him a few days afterwards with one of the great men of this generation, renowned as a Gaon and a tzaddik and a peerless sage. And that Gaon honored him greatly and showed him tokens of love in many ways. You were greatly mistaken in this, my brother." And when Reuven heard this, he was astounded and said: "You have placed a doubt in my heart. It is possible that the truth is with R. Shimon and that only because 'all the ways of a man are just in his eyes' that I thought that the din was with me — or perhaps, in truth the din is with me, but this Shimon is a deceiver and "smooth-talked" this great man until he thought him to be an honorable man; but, nevertheless, I will no longer speak [evil] of him because of the doubt you raised in my heart."

A few days after that, Yehudah, whom Reuven holds to be a man of truth, comes to him and says: "I have seen an even more wonderful thing. The man that you told me that you still had doubts about, that he might be a deceiver and dishonest — I saw him afterwards, meeting with the early sages of the generation, and they, too, honored him greatly and showed him tokens of love in the presence of all. And about the great man of the generation that I told you about in the beginning, — you may have thought that Shimon deceived him; but about men like these it is impossible to say this." When Reuven hears this he immediately replies: "You are right. The yetzer deceived me in the very essence of the thing." Yehudah continues: "Don't I know about Shimon that he met with the early sages of Israel, R. Meir, R. Yehudah, and Rabbi, who redacted the Mishnayoth, and his colleagues, whose company Eliyahu would frequent, as is well known; and they, too, lauded and praised him. And Eliyahu the prophet told these tannaim that this R. Shimon was "spoken of on high" and he heard from the mouth of the Holy One Blessed be He that He loved R. Shimon.

And when Reuven hears this, he recoils and falls on his face and says: "Woe unto me for what I thought at first, that I am the tzaddik and he, the rasha. For from what I see now, this is not so. For the Holy One Blessed be He, who is the Root of all and knows what is done in darkness and in light, whose work is perfect and all His ways just — when He loves a man, certainly His love is not in vain. As far as what passed between me and the honored R. Shimon, I can see this now in several ways. First that the din is with him in principle itself, but, because I was personally involved and I did not know Shimon, it seemed to me that truth and rightness was with me, and this is what I consider most likely. Or, it is possible that Shimon was unwitting in what he did and that he sorely regretted it [thereafter], and it is possible that he yet intends to conciliate me. Or, there may be other reasons that I am not acquainted with. In any case, I have greatly sinned in speaking against a man whom the Holy One Blessed be He, Himself, said that He loved, whose soul-root on high must be exceedingly holy and awesome — publicizing him as "dishonest," "despicable" and "deceitful." I greatly regret this and bear no hatred towards him, since the Holy One Blessed be He, Himself is his Lover.

And this is the intent of the verse "You shall not take revenge and you shall not bear a grudge against the sons of your people. And you shall love your friend as yourself — I am the L-rd." If you say: "How can I make myself not have anything against him and even love him?" the verse itself provides the answer — "I am the L-rd." As per (Malachi 1:2): "'I have loved you,' said the L-rd," and (Devarim 14:1): "You are sons to the L-rd your G-d" — you, too, can love him. And, in truth, the matter is simple. For since a man looks "downwards" at his friend, seeing him clothed in physical matter, he [his friend] is not very significant to him, especially, if he is against him in some matter, in which instance he "nullifies" him completely. Not so the Holy One Blessed be He, who knows, in essence, that the root of the holiness of the soul of Israel is exceedingly great and awesome, as it is written in the holy Zohar in several places, that the root of the holiness of the soul of Israel on high is in an extremely awesome sphere, wherefore their eminence and His love for them, accordingly, are extremely great.]