Shemirat HaLashon שמירת הלשון

And sometimes the cause of habituation to their sin[(lashon hara)] originates in the trait of nirganuth, as [in the instance of] the man whose nature it is to complain and to fume and to find fault with his friend always, against his acts and against his words, even though his friend is completely whole-hearted with him and seeks no occasion against him. And he [the complainer] judges all things in the scales of liability and not of merit, and converts every unwittingness to malice and suspects his friend of being motivated by hatred, as it is written (Devarim 1:27): "And you grumbled in your tents, and you said: 'In the L-rd's hatred of us He took us out, etc.'" One who is afflicted with this evil trait will never escape the sin of lashon hara; for whatever his friend does or says, it will seem to him as if only he were intended.

One who wishes to rescue himself from this evil trait will reflect upon the evils involved in this degrading trait and will rescue himself thereby:

Through this, he transgresses "And you shall love your friend as yourself." And he is also very liable to come thereby to the sin of vain hatred, against which there is an explicit negative commandment in the Torah (Vayikra 19:17): "Do not hate your brother in your heart." And the second Temple was destroyed because of this, as stated in Yoma 9b. And (Shabbath 32b): "Because of the sin of vain hatred, there is great contention in a man's house, his wife miscarries, and a man's sons and daughters die young."

And he also transgresses because of this (Vayikra 19:15): "In righteousness shall you judge your friend," which Chazal interpreted as judging one's friend in the scales of merit. And in Sefer Charedim we find that one who judges his friend in the scales of liability is "the chariot of the shell of uncleanliness" called "Chovah" [(liability)].

And also through this [trait of nirganuth]) one is very liable to suspect the innocent, concerning which Chazal have said (Shabbath 97a): "One who suspects the innocent is stricken in his body."

And [he is] also [liable] to come thereby to the issur of wronging [one with] words and "whitening" his face and to the sin of contention, whose punishment is very severe (as mentioned in Gate 1:15.)

Therefore, if one wishes to rescue his soul from the pit, he will distance himself from this very evil trait, and all will be well with him.

And there are people whose habituation to their sin originates in their considering it permitted. That is, the yetzer deceives them [into thinking] that this thing is not in the category of lashon hara or that the Torah did not forbid speaking lashon hara against this [kind of] man, [and that] to the contrary, it is a mitzvah to demean him for this and this reason.

And, in truth, almost the majority of people stumble into lashon hara because of this failing; that is, the lack of [adequate] knowledge. And there is no remedy for this failing but prior study of all the aspects of the issur of lashon hara according to the din, as we explained in Chafetz Chaim, Part One, principle 1:4 and 5.

And, in truth, this remedy is almost the most effective of all. And not only with lashon hara, but with every mitzvah that he stumbles in [i.e., that he transgresses] many times, until the yetzer hara predominates in this area. And there is nothing new in this [remedy], for it is included in the counsel of "remembering," which is mentioned in the section of tzitzith, viz. (Numbers 15:39): "And you shall see it [(the purple strand)] and you shall remember all the mitzvoth of the L-rd, and you shall do them," as Rashi explains there. For remembering leads to doing. That is, he should study the din that he stumbles in with much concentration on all the details of that din, and he should also review it many times. If he does so, the din will become fixed in his memory and the power of the yetzer in this sin will also be removed from him, as we find in Midrash Rabbah, Parshath Nasso: "If you toil much in their [the rabbis'] words, the Holy One Blessed be He will remove the yetzer hara from you."

A piece of good advice for guarding the tongue: Even if he has already become habituated to it [(i.e., to a certain kind of lashon hara)], G-d forbid, and his yetzer has overcome him in this area, so that he himself does not "feel" the lashon hara that issues from his mouth, still he should not despair, but he should rest assured that by reviewing the din several times, a transformation will take place and the thing [i.e., the din] will become fixed in his nature, and, in the end he will "feel" [i.e., he will be sensitive to] every [article of] speech that leaves his mouth; and even if it be only the "dust" of lashon hara, he will feel it with his tongue at that time. For the Holy One Blessed be He has implanted in a man the faculty of "feeling" [i.e., sensitivity]. And He has done it in such a way that he feels it more when the "thing" comes in contact with his tongue. (This is similar to what Chazal have said (Chullin 17b): "The master examined it [(the slaughtering knife for kashruth)] with his mouth.,") And this faculty is of great avail in the learning of Torah, so that when one brings the thing [(what he is learning)] from his mouth to his tongue, its correctness is "tested." As Chazal have said (Eruvin 54a) on Mishlei 4:22: "For they [(words of Torah)] are life lemotzeihem"… to those who utter them ['lemotzi'eihem'], with their mouths." And the same [phenomenon] holds true for all aspects of speech; but it is only because of his great habituation to superfluous speech and [his tendency] to pay no heed to it that this faculty of his has become greatly weakened. But if he follows our advice (And he certainly will be attentive to what he says from that time on), this faculty of feeling will gradually strengthen itself in him, little by little until it reaches ifs full development.

And, in general, a man should know that so long as it has not become clear to him, according to the din that something is not in the category of lashon hara or rechiluth or machloketh, he should take heed not to say it, even if the yetzer entices him and inclines him to say that there is a mitzvah in this thing and that he will merit the world to come because of it — even so, he should not heed it. For in this way [i.e., by not heeding it], he will certainly be rescued in any event from the din [i.e., the punishment] of Heaven. For even if, in truth, the din [the law] were not with him [(and he should have demeaned the other)] and they ask him on high: "Why did you not demean him in this and this matter? Would it not have been a mitzvah to do so?", he could answer: "To me, it was a matter of doubt, so that I had to govern myself by the rule of "sit and do not do" [i.e., "When in doubt, don't."] As opposed to his demeaning the other or entering into machloketh with him in an instance of doubt, the yetzer enticing him [into believing] that there is a mitzvah in doing so. What will he do afterwards if it becomes clear to him that he had transgressed the issur of lashon hara or machloketh and had only been deceived by the yetzer? How will he answer on high for this? He will not be able to answer that he had spoken thus because of doubt. For, because of doubt, he should not have spoken at all!

[And we can say that this is the intent of (Mishlei 21:33): "One who guards his mouth and his tongue guards his soul from troubles." For, on the surface, does he not merit the world to come for this, as it is written (Psalms 24:13): "Who is the man who wants life, etc.," the intent being eternal life, as the exegetes have written? But, according to what we have said, the verse can be understood as saying that one who guards himself [against speaking] constantly, even when there is a possibility that in his speaking [demeaningly] he might be doing a mitzvah — still, since he guards himself [from speaking demeaningly] because it is not perfectly clear to him [that he may do so], for that reason the verse affirms that the din is with him. For, in any event, he certainly rescues himself thereby [(by his remaining silent)] from the 'troubles' of Gehinnom. As opposed to his doing the reverse, where it might be that instead of entering Gan Eden for this, as he hopes, he might enter Gehinnom thereby if it becomes clear that the din (in speaking disparagingly of the other) is not with him.]

Until this point we have explained the sign of "Kol Gehinnom," the evil traits through which a man is liable to root himself in the trait of lashon hara (See beginning of Chapter XIII). Therefore, the man who wishes to heal himself of this sure illness, to which he has become habituated over a long period of time must first examine himself [to determine] which evil trait caused this, and he must root it out of himself. And then he must begin to heal his soul, little by little, habituating himself to the good traits, which we have spoken of in the previous chapters.